How to plan the perfect wedding essay

How to plan the perfect wedding essay

The Perfect Wedding Essay

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This will be the wedding of dreams. It is designed to be the perfect combinations of two worlds, the one where the relationship began and where the marriage will begin. For the couple who want to combine the best of both worlds it is important to find the perfect marriage of traditions as well as of the couple.

The purpose of this wedding style is to combine the two cultures that are important to the wedding couple. It is important for the couple to feel they have found this combination in order to begin their marriage in the correct manner. The strengths of this plan are the combination of two cultures and providing a perfect marriage beginning.

The weaknesses of the plan involve the extra cost of two sets of wedding outfits and added expense of decorating to be sure to incorporate the floral theme along with the needed cranes and ducks for the Korean traditional meanings (Wedding Details). The opportunities involve learning about traditions from other cultures and incorporating that into the future of the business. The threats to the plan are the difficulties of effectively combining two completely different cultures and traditions in one ceremony.

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The wedding party will include the bride, groom and at least two attendants. The ceremony will begin with the traditional Korean portion of the wedding in which the bride and groom will wear traditional dress. These garments need to be ordered from specialty costume shops and cost approximately the same as western wedding attire. The bride’s costume will have a floral pattern, but will have symbols of cranes and ducks added to the design for good luck and long happy life. Included in the decorations will be some symbolic lanterns lighting the local city park, the park’s existing flowers will be incorporated into the theme to save on the decorating budget.

This will take place on a spring evening for ideal temperature and weather conditions with a rain back-up plan in a near by church. After the traditional Korean portion of the ceremony, the wedding party will quickly change into the proper attire for the western ceremony. The bride and groom will have two complete outfits, but for budget purposes the wedding party will have interchangeable outfits to fit both themes.

These involve colorful shirts for the men. The setting will be perfect to create a sentimental emotion for the wedding party and guests. In order to insure that all politics are followed permissions will need to be received for the park and the time. The reception will follow the ceremony in a nearby reception hall. The buffet will combine traditional menu items of both cultures and will have a cake that includes an edible picture of the couple surrounded by flowers.

The risk management committee discussed safety concerns such as fire hazards involved with the traditional lanterns and seating arrangements for the large number of guests. The committee recommended having electric lights that looked like flaming lanterns. These suggestions will be followed and the seating will be provided by an outdoor restaurant which has a large seating area and can provide suitable seating for the wedding. The park and the reception hall have sufficient insurance to cover any liability issues that could occur at the wedding. Both locations have passed recent inspections and are suitable for public events. All copyrights are submitted to the proper authorities.

The wedding will be in the perfect place, time and theme to create the perfect day for the bride and groom as well as the people who attend the wedding. They will remember their day forever.

Zen habits : breathe

13 Ideas to Keep Your Wedding As Simple As Possible

“My fiance and I are having a little disagreement. What I want is a big church wedding with bridesmaids and flowers and a no-expense-spared reception; what he wants is to break off our engagement.” – Sally Poplin

By Leo Babauta

I’m getting married at the end of this week! Actually, I’m getting re-married — my wife and I have been married for awhile now, but the first time was a super small civil wedding with no reception (we just went to a restaurant). This time we’re getting married in our church, with a bigger reception (300 people).

And while it’s a fairly large wedding, my wife and I have tried our best to keep this wedding as simple as possible. I’d like to share some of the things I’ve been learning for those of you who might be getting married in the future, and who don’t want a big complicated affair.

But I need to start by saying this: if you want a fairly traditional wedding, with the wedding dress and bridesmaids and a reception and all of that, there’s no such thing as a really simple wedding. A wedding can be simple, but only if you and your bride and a few friends go to the court and get married and go to dinner afterward (that’s what we did the first time, essentially). What we’re talking about in this post is the more complicated, traditional wedding, but with some traditions thrown out to keep things a bit simpler.

Even with our wedding plans a bit simplified, we’re still feeling the pressures of the wedding preparations, although things are definitely much easier than they could have been. Here are some ideas to take some of the stress off your wedding:

  1. Keep the guest list small. If you can pull this one step off, the cost for just about everything else will go down, and everything will be fairly simple in comparison. My wife and I weren’t able to pull it off. Well, in a way, we were — we both have extensive families, and on Guam, it’s custom to invite everyone (not only cousins but second and third and fourth cousins, and all the aunts and uncles and grandparents and children at each level). But we limited the guest list to just the first cousins of our parents, and that was an accomplishment. We added just a few close friends, when we could have invited dozens and dozens more. So we ended up with a list of 300 instead of 600, when I would have liked it to be closer to 150.
  2. Keep the menu simple. The biggest cost for us has been food, but we were able to keep it to a reasonable level because we didn’t go for an extravagant, fancy dinner. We didn’t choose a large amount of dishes and desserts either. We chose a few key dishes, all of them simple, and left it at that. While we would like people to enjoy the food, they are not coming there to have a fancy meal — they’ll be there simply to celebrate our marriage and enjoy our company. If that’s not enough for them, it’s not my problem.
  3. Have it catered. When it comes to food, you can go two ways — simple in terms of how much trouble it’ll be (go with a caterer) or simple in terms of costs (have family prepare food). On Guam, it’s customary for family to prepare the food, and we have lots of family that was willing to help. It would have saved us money. But we didn’t want to go through all that trouble — it’s a major hassle — so we went with simple, and we’re happy with that. This way, family can just get dressed and show up and enjoy the celebration.
  4. Get help, and delegate. While we saved our family from having to cook, we are asking for help from a few friends and family. Instead of trying to do all the preparations on our own, others are being enlisted. And trust me, they love to help. There are a lot of little details that need to be taken care of, and if you try to do everything yourself, you’ll be running around like crazy. Instead, allow others to help out, delegate certain tasks, and when they do them, check them off your list. It makes life a lot easier.
  5. Go with the easiest attire. For me and the other guys in our wedding party (my three sons, the father of the bride, and my best man), we chose the simplest attire in terms of how much work it’ll take, and that’s a rented tuxedo. Sure, we could have gone simpler, but we would have had to buy the suits, and that’s a lot of trouble trying to shop for attire that’ll fit all of us. Tuxedos are hassle free. For the girls, we had a cheap dressmaker (from a hole-in-the-wall shop) create some simple dresses for the little girls, then bought some very simple dresses (I mean really simple – like beach dresses) for the bridesmaids. The bride, of course, had a nice dress, but it was fairly inexpensive, with a pretty and classic look.
  6. Forget fancy invitations. Traditional wedding invitations have a couple different envelopes, tissue paper, some other paper, and that’s all before you even get to the invitation itself. It’s way too much trouble and too expensive for my tastes. So we printed our invitations ourselves, on our printer, on stock stationary we got at an office supply store. We didn’t even put them in envelopes or address them. We just printed two invitations per 8.5×11″ sheet of paper, cut the paper in half, and passed out the invitations like that. And instead of mailing them, we had family pass them out — we live on a small island, so there’s not a lot of driving involved.
  7. Don’t try to impress. This is key — if you try to impress people with your fancy wedding, you’ll go to a lot of trouble and expense. It’s really not worth it. Everyone has been to fancy weddings, and while they’re nice, they last for one day and they put you deeply in debt. We decided we’d rather stay out of debt, minimize our stress levels, and spend some of the money on our honeymoon. It really doesn’t matter to the guests anyway — like I said, they’re just there to celebrate your wedding, and don’t really care if you don’t go all out. If they do, that’s their problem.
  8. Keep the decorations simple. We’re going to have a few floral arrangements, some candles, and that’s it. Very minimal, very little trouble, very little expense.
  9. Simple favors. We’re going to have some traditional Guam-style candy (coconut candy), put in little inexpensive favor boxes. And that’s all.
  10. Simple entertainment. We’ll have some traditional island-style cultural dancers, an acoustic musical group, and that’s all.
  11. Have a coordinator. This doesn’t have to be a fancy wedding coordinator, but can simply be a family member who you trust to run things according to your plan. If you have someone else taking care of all the details on the day of the wedding yourself, you don’t have to worry about it, and can relax and enjoy the festivities.
  12. Hold it early in the day. Our church ceremony will take place at 9:00 a. m., and the reception will start at 11:00 a. m., so it’s a lunch buffet. This minimizes costs, and allows us to finish early and go to our hotel room afterward before we’re completely exhausted. Plus, it’s on a weekday (Friday), so many people will have to go back to work after lunch, meaning the party won’t last that long and there won’t be any drinking. That keeps things even simpler.

I’d like to hear from the rest of you — what are your ideas to keep a wedding simple?

“I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner

Posted: Sunday, June 15, 2008

How to Be a Great Wedding Guest

There’s more to attending a wedding than getting dressed up, shedding a few tears and partying all night long—you have some important responsibilities too. Here’s the low-down on how to be a stellar wedding guest.

Getting an Invitation

When you receive an invite (usually six to eight weeks before the wedding), don’t let it get lost on the coffee table. Check the event date and consult your calendar, then decide if you’ll attend. Whether or not you can make it, respond as soon as you can—the RSVP date on the invitation isn’t arbitrary. The couple needs to know who’s coming promptly in order to give their vendors, like the caterer, a final head count no later than two weeks before the wedding. Your procrastination may seem trivial, but it could actually add to the couple’s planning stress.

Your response will depend on the invitation. If there’s a preprinted response card, fill in the blanks: «Ms. Kim Williams and Mr. Brian Jones will» or «will not» attend (and editorialize a bit, if you like: «will happily» attend). If you haven’t spoken to the to-be-weds recently, feel free to slip an additional note of congrats into the prestamped envelope.

The most formal invitations may arrive without a printed response card. In this case, you should write your response on nice stationery, mirroring the language of the invitation: «Ms. Kim Williams and Mr. Brian Jones/accept with pleasure/the invitation of/Mr. and Mrs. Michael Livingston/for Saturday, the second of August/at five o’ clock in the evening.» If you can’t make it, write, «Ms. Kim Williams/regrets that she is unable to accept/the kind invitation of/etc.» (You don’t need to include the time on a regret, just the date). If the invitation is more casual but doesn’t include a response card, just write a warm, informal note accepting or declining.

A few dos and don’ts:

  • Do let the hosts know if you must cancel at the last minute; don’t just not show up.
  • Don’t assume you can invite a plus-one unless it says «and Guest» on the outer envelope along with your name. Only the people to whom the invite is specifically addressed are invited. This may be obvious, but you’d be surprised how many wedding guests think they can invite a friend (or two) to the wedding. The bottom line: The couple decides who’s invited, and you should not ask if you can bring someone else along—even if it’s your significant other.

Getting an Announcement

Even if you’re not invited to the event, receiving a wedding announcement means the couple still wants you to know about it. Don’t get mortally offended off the bat—if they’re close friends, they may have chosen to have an intimate family wedding and couldn’t invite all their friends. If it’s not such a close friend, or it’s a business associate, don’t feel obligated to send a gift. It’s a nice gesture to send a personal note of congratulations, but even that isn’t automatically expected.

Always plan on sending a gift when you accept a wedding invitation. If you can’t make the wedding, it’s still nice to send a gift, but you won’t be committing a major faux pas if you don’t. At the least, send a congratulatory card before the wedding.

Technically, you have up to a year after the wedding date to send a gift, but it makes sense to shop for a gift soon after you decide to go. If the couple has a wedding website, registry information will most likely be there. If not, find out where the couple is registered by asking the bride’s mother or siblings, or the couple themselves.

The wedding gift should be sent to the address the couple has given their registry—don’t bring it with you to the reception. While this is still the custom in some regions, gifts at the wedding mean the couple has to worry about security, making sure cards stay with boxes and getting them home somehow after the reception. (Also, you’d have to lug it along with you that day.)

You don’t have to get the couple a gift from their registry, of course, but the upside is they’ve chosen these items themselves, so you know they want and like them. If you have another, special gift idea, by all means, go for it. But still send or bring it to the couple’s home instead of handing it to them on the wedding day. (If you’re not having a package mailed through a store, make sure to insure the box against damage.) If you want to give the couple a money gift, make your check payable to the bride or groom if you’re sending it before the wedding (use the bride’s maiden name), or to both of them if you give it to them on the wedding day or after.

What to Wear

Dress as you would for any other social event held at the hour and during the season of the wedding. For example, if it’s a spring brunch or luncheon, a pretty suit or floral dress would be appropriate for women; a light-colored suit and/or shirt and tie for men. For evening, depending on how formal the wedding is (you can usually tell this from the formality of the invitation and/or where the wedding is being held), the dress code is cocktail dresses for women and darker suits (or tuxedos, if it’s a black-tie affair) for men. Avoid wearing anything too flashy—and remember that if the ceremony is at a religious site, you don’t want to show too much skin (for example, shoulders might need to be covered).

Black used to be taboo for weddings, but these days, a black dress is perfect for an evening wedding. Female wedding guests should not wear white—it’s considered extremely impolite to take away from the bride on her day by wearing her color. Avoid off-white and ivory too, unless there’s a dress code mentioned on the invitation or wedding website that instructs guests to wear a certain color.

The Ceremony

You should get to the ceremony on time—this is not a party to be «fashionably late» for. Also, never consider ditching the ceremony and just showing up for the reception. You’ve been invited as an honored wedding guest to watch this couple get married.

Ideally, you should arrive at the ceremony site 30 minutes before the time printed on the invitation, and even earlier for a large event (200 wedding guests or more). If you get there after it’s begun, seat yourself quietly in the back. If the procession is going on, wait until the bride reaches the altar to enter and find a seat.

You’re not expected to participate in religious rituals (if you’re Jewish and attending a Catholic wedding, for example, you don’t receive Communion). But it’s polite to follow the lead of family members sitting in front as far as standing and sitting goes (you don’t have to kneel if you don’t want to, though). After the recession, wedding guests remain in their seats until the families of the newlyweds have been escorted out. If the receiving line is scheduled postceremony, simply join in the line.

The Reception

Usually the first thing you’ll see at the reception (if the couple has arrived before the guests, which is ideal) is the receiving line. Don’t blow it off—this is your opportunity to talk one-on-one with the couple, meet the bride or groom if you haven’t yet, and thank their parents for inviting you. Especially if it’s a large wedding, you might not get a chance to chat with the couple later. Don’t spend too much time in line, though—just say a heartfelt congrats, shake a few hands then proceed to the reception.

After the receiving line, it’s time for the cocktail hour, when guests mix and mingle over drinks and hors d’oeuvres. This is prime socializing time, so enjoy! You’ll know when it’s officially time to be seated for the meal, but it’s fine to sit before you’re asked to (although it’s more fun to walk around a talk to people). Don’t just park it anywhere, though. Check the seating chart and sit where you’re supposed to. When you find your table, introduce yourself to anyone you don’t know and explain your connection to the couple. Be nice and a little adventurous—don’t just talk to people you’re already acquainted with. If there’s a specific seating arrangement, the couple probably put you with people they thought you’d enjoy talking to, so you probably will.

When it comes to dancing, guests generally follow the lead of the couple, wedding party and families. Usually the newlyweds dance together first (although the first dance sometimes happens later on in the reception). Once the party gets going, though, feel free to dance as much as you want to.

As for the bouquet throw and garter toss, if you’re not crazy about these traditions, don’t just avoid them by hiding out in the bathroom. If you’re not someone inclined to dive for the bouquet or garter, just go out there and stand in the back with a smile or remain seated at your table. Even if you think these traditions are silly, or that something else about the wedding is tacky or inappropriate, always keep your feelings to yourself. This might not be exactly how you’d do it, but the couple chose to do it, and it’s not your place to complain or criticize.

When is it appropriate to leave? Receptions usually last about four hours, and you’ll know when things start winding down. You should stay at least until after the cake has been cut. Many brides and grooms stay until the bitter end these days, so it’s hard to leave after them. When you decide to head out, find a member of the bride’s immediate family (like her mom) and thank them. Also attempt to give the couple a last hug before you leave.

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